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Title: Somehow
Author/Artist: Hinata Plusle
Prompt: Finland, Denmark - Closed Doors - (AU or 1500s)
Other characters: none
Rating: K
Content notes: none
Summary: To be unable to pinpoint why it didn’t feel right was another very frustrating thing.

It was terribly frustrating to be an underling.

Not that Finland knew that much of not being one. With nothing more than foggy flashes as memory for his early childhood, the first clear periods he remembered… He had already been an underling. And, judging from his flashes, it wasn’t really like he got to decide or have a say at anything when he was smaller, because, well, even though he was a personification, he’d been a mere child then. Not particularly wise, clever or skillful, just gutsy and brave – which probably didn’t mean much without extensive knowledge, a thing no child has, personification or not.

Still, something about having a superior was unsettling. Somehow, he knew he was not supposed to have to deal with that. He was not a town or a “region”, he was aware of it. There was no real proof of it, at least not that he could see, but he could understand very well that he was no reason to believe he had to be where he was. It felt unnatural. And, while he knew “natural” was no synonym to “good” (death and hunger were natural and people really didn’t seem to like them, and neither did he), this was a time he somehow understood that was not a good sign.
To be unable to pinpoint why it didn’t feel right was another very frustrating thing. After all, if he really could elaborate on it well, perhaps he could understand what he should do about it better, knowing more about what got on his nerves about the issue and possibly persuading others into helping him with whatever caused that.

But that was not the case.

Finland – ugh, that name, it felt so wrong – had no true arguments, and he didn’t know how to look for them either, because he had no idea what exactly was wrong about it. It was not right, there was something wrong, but what? He had no idea.

He just felt like he deserved to be on the other side of those closed doors, when his superiors would negotiate, kind of like an "adults' room". While he felt no need to be their superior, he didn’t want to be an underling. It felt like he’d be a huge mess on his own, but he somehow knew he’d rather be a mess on his own than succeed on the shadow of those behind that door.

Somehow, somehow, somehow. Couldn’t those ambiguous words just stop? They never did anything useful to him anyway.

It was no use talking to humans about it, and he didn’t even dare ask other personifications. He didn’t quite understand, but among the older ones, it was kind of taboo. What about that was taboo, he never knew, but he wasn’t going go ask and address the white elephant in the room, not at all.
But, to be honest, he didn’t have to ask.

Denmark, of all people, with a half-goofy, half-knowing smile, laughed and suddenly patted on his back out of the blue.

“Don’t worry, you’ll understand what all of this means soon enough.”
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